I Will Chuck Norris Your Ass

9 Apr

The next unknown man that calls me sexy

is going to be karate chopped in the throat.

I’ll make him choke on his syllables

standing the street we share.

I have spent a decade trying to obtain

some popular measure of beauty

and will spend the next decade

shattering the mirrors constructed

so that I can see myself.

I am more than my curves.

My unique facial structure that depicts

an alluring “otherness”

is not my favourite self feature.

A lovers lips may praise me

but if my character, values, and essence

are unknown to you,

do not take it upon yourself

to let me know just how sexy I am

because I’ll Chuck Norris your ass

with my feminine feminist right hand.


7 Responses to “I Will Chuck Norris Your Ass”

  1. angrygaijin April 9, 2013 at 12:47 am #

    WHOOHH!!! Awesome! 😀

    • Helen K April 9, 2013 at 12:48 am #

      haha thanks, just a moment today that I found annoying, might as well throw chuck Norris into the equation 😉

  2. Tom April 9, 2013 at 1:28 am #

    I like Chuck Norris so much. He is my role model for real.

    • Helen K April 9, 2013 at 7:59 am #

      Everyone needs a hero. lol

  3. rnwdgaf April 9, 2013 at 1:39 am #

    FOR THE WIN. i dig this shit,

  4. emilymaeve May 9, 2013 at 9:24 am #

    Stop. YOU BLOW ME AWAY!!!!


  1. I Will Chuck Norris Your Ass | emilymaeve - May 9, 2013

    […] I Will Chuck Norris Your Ass. […]

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